Finding God in grief

Have you ever felt like a dark cloud was over you? Have you ever entered a room and closed the door or blinds, and you saw nothing but pitch black?

I remember as a kid entering the closet and closing the door…and it was totally dark. Light still shone in some way outside that room. Even though what I experienced was darkness or absence of light. The door and the walls blocked the light from my view.

Such an illustration describes our experience with grief. You may feel God is distant in such times.

If you’re experiencing darkness in your life as a result of grieving, I want to encourage you to open the door and allow the light of Jesus Christ to shine in that darkness.

On this page, I’d like to share three major steps, whereby you can do that.
As in the example just mentioned, light is still there outside of a dark room. Even if what we are experiencing is total darkness, Jesus is still there. No darkness is able to overcome that light.

Before I share the three steps, I want to mention these verses that describe God as a light that shines in our darkness.

Finding God in Grief; Lighting up the Darkness

2 Samuel 22:29: For You, O LORD, are my lamp; the LORD lights up my darkness.

The Lord lights up our darkness, but He is inviting us to let Him light up those areas of our lives. In a dark closet, I must do something to let the light shine.

I must open the door.
I must turn on the light.
I must take an action.

What steps do you need to take so that the Lord can light up your darkness?

Picture a room you have entered, and you sit down at a desk. You reach for the lamp. You turn on the light, because you want to read or work at your desk. It makes sense that you set the lamp on the desk, close to where you are, so you can do what you need to do. You wouldn’t go to your desk and set the lamp all the way across the room.

What does this tell us about the presence of God?

He wants us to have Him as a lamp close to us, so that we can see light in the midst of the darkness. And we’re not talking about just any light, but His divine light…that we may be able to move forward in the grief journey. When God describes Himself as a lamp for us, the implication is He wants to be close to us.

Five Steps to Finding God in Grief

How do we get close to God so we can experience His light in the darkness? Here is the process…

Step # 1: Cry out to God…call out to Him in the midst of Your grief.

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you (James 4:8).

Step # 2:  Enter into the presence of God.

God is everywhere, but in terms of our personal relationship with Him, I encourage you to find a quiet place and for an extended period of time. There, you can draw near to that light…in the quiet, where you can listen to God and His Words of comfort and encouragement for you.

Step # 3: Take the Lamp with You--God's Word!

Wherever you go to meet with the Lord----another aspect of that light is His Word.

Take His Word into that space. The Psalmist says to God, "Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path."

When you go to meet with the Lord, take the Word of God with you. To allow Him to shine His light in your darkness, Search the Scriptures, where you experience the Lord talking to You and offering His comforting presence.

I remember a moment in my life when I was grieving a loss, and I found that comfort as the Holy Spirit led me to the Scriptures. I opened to the Book of Ruth in the Old Testament and it’s a passage that many can relate to due to Naomi’s grief and loss. Also, she spoke honestly about her feelings of bitterness.

Then…also in the Psalms, many of which express negative human emotions and grief, but yet invite the light of God into their situations.

The idea of a lamp on the table next to you while you’re reading brings to mind the importance of closeness to God.

Step # 4: As you sit by the lamp, spend time in prayer. 

Sitting by the lamp also involves prayer…to build that relationship with the Lord.

• Another place that you want to go that is lit up in the spiritual sense is God’s House.

God’s church though is not just a building…Collectively we are brothers and sisters in the Lord, which makes up the body of Christ. In the sanctuary or in a prayerful church setting, you can hear the Word of God, receive prayer, and dig into the Word of God with your brothers and sisters in Christ who offer support in your journey.


Step # 5:  Stay in God’s Light Continually and Take that Light with You.

So far, I mentioned calling or crying out to God, going to where the lamp is, and third staying in that light continually. Psalm 18:28 says You, Lord, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.

It’s one thing to go where the lamp is and be close to God in a particular moment. It’s another thing to allow God to keep that lamp burning. As a result, we can take the light of God wherever we go.

If you’re experiencing grief, loneliness, stress, and so forth, know that you're not alone. So many other people are dealing with the same issues. Carrying the lamp of God with you will enable you to be an encouragement to someone in a time of need.

How The Psalmists Found God in Their Grief

Grief is a universal human experience. There’s no time limit on grief. Also, everyone grieves in their own, unique way. But we can move forward, no matter what the situation is, because God is with us.

Looking at the Psalms as a whole—as mentioned, they expressed negative human emotions and faced dark situations…Here are some of the statements of faith in the midst of that:

Psalm 46:1: God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in times of trouble.

Psalm 13:5: I trust in Your unfailing love.

Psalm 23:4: Yeah though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, you are WITH me.

Psalm 34:18: The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 119:150: My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life.

Psalm 27:14: Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart…and wait for the Lord.

Psalm 119:105: Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.

Summary of the Journey From the Darkness of Grief into the Light

Once again, call out to God, find that quiet space to meet with God, and stay in God’s light and reflect that to others who are grieving as well as people in general.

Summary of the Journey From the Darkness of Grief into the Light

Once again, call out to God, find that quiet space to meet with God, and stay in God’s light. Then reflect His brightness to others who are grieving as well as people in general.

For more on going through the grief journey, click here: Dealing With Grief and Loss (encouragementscriptures.com).